coast~

Been in this spot

How many times

Life spinning

Round the clock

Here we go

Another ride

Another place

Disappointed

Another disgrace

Heart is heavy

Lungs deflated

Everything anticipated

Soft lips

Clenched jaw

Worried faces

Pain in stomach

Empty spaces

Eyelids close

Remembering much

Aching for your loving touch

Passion

Drive

Whirlwinds

Surprise

This reflection

I despise

“….Hello?...........Hello?......”
I’ve sat in a meditative state for hours allowing you to say whatever need be said to the "adult me" and to the child within. I'm open to hearing even the harsh truths. I’ve wondered what it’s like to stand next to you as grown daughter alongside grown mother~
Woman to woman!
I sing often and on rare occasions I believe I’ve felt your smile. 
I whisper to you (nearly) daily.
I’ve closed my eyes so tightly and sat for so long that my sit bones ache.
My sons have sent you messages with balloons; I hope you have each one because I’ve told them it’s how you’ll greet them. It’s been nearly 20 years since you’ve passed on… it took me touching your frozen hand to know that you were really “gone” It’s a feeling I’ll never forget. When one needs guidance women often turn to their mother….
Today I turn to you
Without a compass
Without an idea of where you are
“……hello??..........hello?...” .....

Play with words~

whirlwind

procrastination

arbitrary

whim

pseudo

impulse

fragile

deficit

passion

racing

torture

indecision

choices

life

discriminate

arrogance

disorder

benevolence

time

compulsion

attention

pessimistic

one

two

three

four

and

more....

Fly or Fall. Fall or Fly~

wishing air was beating life into flight

on tattered wings of the lil black bird

grayer skies, little direction,

so much desire, so little affection.

heart on lifted wings of hope

all the emotions built up in smoke

lil black bird don't go there

it is more than heart can bare

can't pretend smoke won't kill

concrete heart won't ever heal

let it beat

let it fight

let it open up tonight

one must open eyes to see

the beauty that life can be.