Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Chronic~

Bloody hell my back is NOT well...
I haven't slept much in a few days...
Im completely overwhelmed and ready to scream... shout...cry...
I would do whatever works at this point...
I have prayed
I have been zen
I have ignored it
I have seen orthopedic specialists & chiropractors,
I have had the deepest tissue massage that one can imagine (Rolfing)
I have had countless needles poked into me (acupuncture)
I have had a spinal steroid injection
I have endured a 38 min. MRI (Buried alive type experience ICK: Claustrophobic!)
I have cried
I have yelled
I have been mean
I have sworn
I have showered, bathed, sauna'd, sweated, shivered, iced/hot packed...
I have thrown things
I have taken countless medications and given them a true shot...
I have blamed myself and others
I have worked out (yoga, swimming, stretching, running, biking, and more)
I have sat and waited....
Today Im out of words, out of energy, out of ideas... I don't want chronic back pain to win me over....
I WANT MY LIFE BACK!!!
I want to see even a glimpse of light at the end of my tunnel....


2 comments:

Whitney and Family said...

YUCK!!! Hope something helps you soon. Hang in there!!!

Anonymous said...

maybe some daisies would cheer you up?